Do you like the t-shirt I'm wearing in this photo? Ah, I see, perhaps I got a little bit excited while taking it. It's a t-shirt from Pictures For Sad Children and says, "A brief history of art," followed by one person saying, "Look" and the next saying "Look at me" - it's really rather wonderful. Jonathan and I sat on the floor this morning like it was Christmas, opening our parcel from Topatoco, which is just as well, as the latest t-shirt from T-post wasn't really to my taste. It might end up on ebay unless some hipster reading this makes me a better offer for it.
The picture makes my eyes water a little bit.
Let's see, there's rather a lot for me to tell you about, isn't there? I told you about winning money for tongue skills at the Deaf pub, showed you how bad I still am at using Illustrator, told you about how my mother rotted her septum by snorting drugs and I posted a picture of some dead ladybirds. Clearly there's a lot more happening than that if those are the only things I've been telling you about.
Well, the trip to Malmö was awesome. We stayed in Erik's flat and managed to avoid leaving dirty syringes and burned spoons all over the place, so hopefully he won't be too upset with us when he gets home. I really like having a place we can squat in whenever we need a few days away. I might even use it as a refuge if I need to catch up some pace with my work while I'm at college. That was kind of my plan a few years back before all kinds of silly nonsense got in the way.
The staff at Gatwick were a hoot; they looked at our passports and made fun of where we'd both been born, tried to make lewd suggestions about Jonathan's banana and the man by the metal detector said, "I'm terribly sorry sir, I'm going to have to squeeze your nipple." Which he did, to check it was pierced, and then he accidentally hit me in the face while I was watching him do it. His colleague said I should sue and I told her I wouldn't stand a chance because clearly there wasn't enough CCTV going on there.
This time, they didn't check to see if my phone was on drugs. Just as well, considering the last time they swabbed my phone they missed a dodgy text message from Chris by about a minute. Phew, eh? Sadly, nothing to do with meth or bombs or anything like that.
What did we do in Malmö? Well, it was the Malmö festival, but sadly we missed the headline act, Lady Sovereign. I hope she confused the hell out of them all. Instead, we saw some parpy jazz bands and Neneh Cherry's sister or someone like that. She was great, but the sound engineer let her down. She had an annoying habit of wandering over to an electric drum and hitting it out of time, so we had a whale of a time hitting each other with empty coke bottles we'd filled with vodka.
I had a look for locally made comics, but couldn't find any, which I thought was a bit odd because Malmö apparently produces some good illustrators. I shall have to go back again and have a proper look around. The comics shop did have some rather fine looking Call of Cthulhu game books that are hard to find here now. Damn the stupid exchange rate and my tiny rucksack.
We had a day out in Copenhagen before the Danish Kronor threatened us with bankruptcy for wanting to buy some chewing gum and we fled back on the train to Malmö, our slightly dull but wonderfully familiar home from home. Needless to say the next few weeks will be a bit lean on my side and will probably eat up a fair chunk of Jonathan's redundancy money. Erk. That Start of Term macbook air might just have to wait for a little while yet.
I had a long talk with someone who is doing a PhD at Oxford and I have to say I did then take a look at how the PhD programme at arts.ac.uk looks and I might see if I can do well enough in the MA to look at doing something higher. It's funny, now the ADHD is diagnosed and I'm starting to notice stupid behaviours I've learned, I'm starting to feel like I can achieve all kinds of things I'd have thought impossible. I might write a little more about this at some point soon, so I won't bore you with it now.
Anyway, yes, Malmö was a really welcome little break for Jonathan and me and I've come back refreshed and ready to take over the world, or at least try to get my life in order.
I'm determined I'm going to do well at college, otherwise there's no point in devoting the next two years of my life to it. I'm planning on trying to do two days a week paid work, either with museums and galleries or as an interpreter (only little short bookings until I know my hands can take it), I'm hoping to make it to the gym four mornings a week, spend three days a week at college or on college work, get to the theatre once a fortnight, go to gallery openings whenever I can and generally live like the person I'm hoping to become. Of course, I'm still going to spend loads of time playing role-playing games and killing monsters on the xbox, but clearly this is all in the name of research!
Um. I've totally lost track of what I was talking about now, sorry. Um. Oh! I went back to the gym today. There were naked men all over the place, but I really couldn't be bothered with them. I'm not in crippling pain in my arms yet, so it might just be I'll be okay there now.
Err, that was it. You probably didn't get past the weird photo, did you?